the letting go

Well, it is March 1, and no word from Craig on the SE house. We dropped off the applications Thursday night while he was out of town, and I e-mailed him Friday and never heard back from him. I called him Monday night and he said he hadn't finished processing the applications but planned to finish them tomorrow. I asked if he needed anything else, and he said he would call if he did.

Since we haven't heard, I am assuming we didn't get the house. I can only think it is because of the bankruptcies, since we have great references and he liked us so much.

I know it is not the end of the world. We will stay here till the end of May and we will have a lot more money saved up. And I know it is not the only nice house. But I really loved that kitchen. I loved the house, I felt at home there. And I just feel like we have big scarlet Bs tatooed on our forehead. I feel like it changes how people think of us. It makes me wonder if we will have problems at another house. Tim keeps reminding me that Hannah (our landlord here) was very thorough, and she didn't care about the bankruptcies.

So, now I'm trying to let the house go and remember that I shouldn't get too excited about something before it happens. And trying to remember that we will find another house we love just as much. I still feel like a bankruptcy loser though.