I feel like Kellyfixit

Le sigh. I'm tired of friends who only want me around to fix their problems. They show up when they are sad, feeling bad, having problems, whatever, and they come to me...to make them feel better, to cheer them up, to give them suggestions for what to do, to help them. And then they disappear again. Like Tawny. Like Lisa. Like Lauren. Like Jaime.

I don't know why I am in this friend pattern. Do I make myself too available? Do I try to help people too much so that becomes all they see me for? Maybe that's it. I never really thought that was a bad thing, I thought I was trying to be there for people who needed it. But somehow, that has become my typical friend pattern. People don't stick around for the hey, do you want to get together tonight? Hey, I was thinking of you, how are YOU doing? Once they are feeling better or have some ideas of how to make things better, they leave and I'm left feeling sad and used.

Is it unreasonable to expect/wish/hope that the effort I put into friendship would be returned? That people would write to me just to say hi, like I do for them? Mikki and Toni are definitely the exceptions here, they are both actual real friends to me.

But how do I fix it? I don't want friendship if it means not being me. But I feel like I at least have to be less of me, and instead of offering advice, or listening to people whenever they feel bad...just be like, i'm sorry, that sucks. Now about this other thing...

I don't know. I'm probably not making much sense. It just really makes me feel bad.